My Dad's in Jail.. advice how to cope?

My Dad is in jail at the moment. He has been in my life since I was born and, now I haven't seen him in almost a year. ): I really miss him- The only way we communicate is by letter's. I miss him so much I can't call him or see him because, of a protective order my Mom has against him. Can someone give me advice? Stories are welcome too. I just Miss My Daddy- Not to seem like a cry baby.My Dad's in Jail.. advice how to cope?
my dad was in prison for two and a half years. i didn't even bother to say goodbye to him. and of the two and a half years i only saw him three times. it was so hard to be away from him because i was a daddy's little girl. i rarely got to talk to my dad because my mom was the only one who was allowed to talk to him. i don't know if i could really give you any advice on how to cope with it, because it really is hard. but i would just keep writing letters and hold on to the ones that he does write you. see if he can call a family members house, and arrange for you to be there once he calls. that might help you a little bit, but guaranteed you will cry after hearing his voice for so long. if you need to talk about it, just message me. i know how difficult of a time this is for you.My Dad's in Jail.. advice how to cope?
Well as for you talking on the phone, it depends if it is county or prison. County usually has a collect call set up. Usually only 15 minutes or so. Seeing him would take special things. There is special requirements for minors. One thing that you have to do is talk to your mom. tell her that protecting you is great but I also miss my dad and need that bond with my dad. One question I would have for your mom is what is this charge she has on him? But always keep writing him. Those letters need much more then you can ever know. remember that they are read before he gets them also.
Tell your mom you really miss your Dad and would like to be able to see him and that if you can't see him, just to be able to call him and hear his voice.


If your mom will not permit this, hold on dearly to his letters and write encouraging letters to him.


I don't know what he did to deserve the protective order, so your mom may not budge, but at least you can ask.
My dad was in and out of prison my whole life and it was very hard to cope with. you know i was daddys little girl and daddy was never there.





The main thing i did to cope was write him all the time. i did not get to visit my father either he was in a prison way to far from were i lived and him and my mom split up so she thought it was a waste to go and see him.





i also kept a diary of my feelings towards how my life was and how i felt about my father since my mom did not care to hear about it.





I always kept a positive mind and i stayed positive in the letters i wrote him. cause i new i needed to not only stay strong for myself but my father as well.





Dealing with something like this is not a easy task. and it is not something your mind can get rid of, just think positive and count down to the days you get to see him agian an know that the days are getting closer not further away.





The best luck to you and your father i know it is not easy just stay strong.
well when i was 10 years old my dad went to jail for about a year and it was hard i wrote letters to him ...... it wasent as hard as it sound like your going trow becasue my dad was not around and now he is out of jail and he reliquished all of his custidy so i dont see him.... but i know it is hard the best thing to do is to keep writing the letters and just wait till he gets out ..... but rember what you go throw now is what makes you stronger





well sorry about your dad, but dont give up hope!!!!
You poor thing...u are not being a baby at all! You hear? I seriously would talk to yur momma and let her know how you feel. If she is the one with issues unrealted to you, i would tell her you miss him alot and would really like to visit once in a while. the reason she might be reluctant could be because she thinks it might not be useful for you or harmful. She loves you just as much...talk it out. Tell her how you feel without anger. That's always a good way to make your needs known. I have not had to go through this, but I can only imagine what you are feeling, and I am truely sorry. Stay positive and strong. If talking you your mother seems hard, maybe try a pastor or relative. Maybe a close family friend. On a lighter note, keep writing your letters...besides keeping contact, it's a good outlet for releasing energy and feelings and believe it or not, VERY good for you. Good luck, and know that you are in my thoughts and prayers.
My Dad is in prison now - he's been in 3 years and will probably do another 2. It's hard not having him around as he would be good for playing footie with or just hanging out. I go to visit him every month so I'm used to that now. He stills gives out to me about my school results and starting to smoke and stuff like that. It must be real hard if you don't get to see him but if there's an order I don't know how you would get around it.
Only you know what you dad is like and why he is in jail. I think for now you must be glad for the letters put a picture of you in there for him. While you miss him you know where he is and while there you will know where he is. Maybe in time things will get better.
What did he go in for? Is he in jail or prison?





Talk to you mom about it.





Edited 7/5/09:





Now that you told us what he is in for, I have to tell you this: Your Mom knows best in this case. Perhaps you see a side of your Dad that is not as dark, but I believe that if you think about it, you'll find the abuse of the closest people around him to have included You. At the very least you were a witness to his bad side and that is not healthy at all. I'm sorry to say but your Dad has a destructive personality and he will eventually destroy you too. Your Mom has very solid reasons for that protective order.


Keep in touch with your letters. It's the safest way to communicate and I hope you don't allow yourself to be a tool of your Dad. You may think your Mom is keeping you both separated out of revenge but that is not true.


Don't take sides and don't encourage your dad to use you.





Perhaps in the future like in 2 decades, your dad's mean streak will have fizzled and a better man comes out of it. If not, age and health problems will subdue him.